Indian version of Indy 500.

[Andre40]

Hi Everybody,

When Mumbai in India was still Bombay, the city fathers gathered one day to figure out how to promote tourism to the city. One member suggested a marathon and quoted successful examples that give great publicity to the respective cities, ie the The New York Marathon, Two Oceans Marathon in Cape Town and the London to Brighton Marathon.

Everyone agreed and the adverts went out. Being a country of over a billion people over a million entries were received. The Bombay traffic chief threw his toys out of the cot, shouting, impossible too many! Then to reduce numbers one member suggested making it open to Indian gentlemen with no left arm. The numbers came down to about 100,000, but were still far too many. Various permutations of missing limbs were proposed but still too many.

Then one bright spark suggested making it open to Indian gentlemen with no testicles. Exactly 500 entries were received and the Bombay traffic chief was ecstatic.

The marathon was on and it was named THE INDIAKNACKERLESS 500.

Goodness gracious,
Andre 40

[Pete.]

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[jimbo]

OK, here's another one...the Vatican and the College of Cardinals got the bright idea of having an international golf tournament that they would host in Rome to promote world peace. Every country agreed it was a great idea, and all agreed to send their top golfers at their own expense to compete in the First Vatican Int'l Peace Tournament...until the Pope asked, "By the way, who is the Church's entry in the game?"
No one knew. No one had thought of it. All of the cardinals were too old and none of them golfed, anyway.
Finally, one of the American cardinals had a suggestion. "Holy Father, " he said "there's an American golfer who's semiretired, who's Catholic, named Jack Nicklaus. He's a famous player and a devout churchgoer, and I am sure he'd be honored to play for the good of the Church." "Fine," said the Pope."Would you ask him?"
Nicklaus was contacted and immediately agreed to play as the Church's representative, also offering to pay his own way and all of his expenses as a gift to the Church. The Pope was so moved by this that he asked the College of Cardinals to honor Nicklaus by naming him as an honorary Cardinal for the weekend.
After the tournament, which was a great success, "Cardinal" Nicklaus returned to the Pope's chambers to give him an account of the game. "How did it go?" asked the Pope.
"Well, Holy Father," said Nicklaus, "it was wonderful. I'd never played for the church before, and it inspired me. My tee shots were great, my drives straight and true, and my putting excellent. I had a great day."
"Congratulations on your victory, 'Cardinal'" smiled the Pope.
"Oh, I didn't win, Your Holiness," said Nicklaus. "I came in second to Rabbi Woods."

[Andre40]

Thanks Jim,

Great one, very well told!

Best,
Andre 40