Girt! waddaya mean Girt?

Pete McCluskey.

Lifetime Supporter
All the Aussie's will understand this and most of the Kiwi's. The rest of you have fun trying to figure it out.:thumbsup:


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You know you're Australian if: <o:p></o:p>

<o:p></o:p>

1. You know the meaning of the word 'girt'.<o:p></o:p>

2. You believe that stubbies can be either drunk or worn.<o:p></o:p>

3. You think it's normal to have a Prime Minister called Kevin.<o:p></o:p>

4. You waddle when you walk due to the 53 expired petrol discount vouchers <o:p></o:p>

stuffed in your wallet or purse.<o:p></o:p>

5. You've made a bong out of your garden hose rather than use it for something illegal <o:p></o:p>

such as watering the garden.<o:p></o:p>

6. You believe it is appropriate to put a rubber in your son's pencil case when he first attends school.<o:p></o:p>

7. When you hear that an American 'roots for his team' you wonder how often and with whom.<o:p></o:p>

8. You understand that the phrase 'a group of women wearing black thongs refers to footwear <o:p></o:p>

and may be less alluring than it sounds.<o:p></o:p>

9. You pronounce <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com
><st1:place w:st=
Melbourne</st1:place> as 'Mel-bin'.<o:p></o:p>


10. You pronounce Penrith as 'Pen-riff'.<o:p></o:p>

11. You believe the 'L' in the word '<st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Australia</st1:place></st1:country-region>' is optional.<o:p></o:p>

12. You can translate: 'Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas.' <o:p></o:p>

13. You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate it's highways <o:p></o:p>

with large fibreglass bananas, prawns and sheep.<o:p></o:p>

14. You call your best friend 'a total bastard' but someone you really, <o:p></o:p>

truly despise is just 'a bit of a bastard'.<o:p></o:p>

15. You think 'Woolloomooloo' is a perfectly reasonable name for a Place.<o:p></o:p>

16. You're secretly proud of our killer wildlife.<o:p></o:p>

17. You believe it makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's twice as big as its $2 coin.<o:p></o:p>

18. You understand that 'Wagga Wagga' can be abbreviated to 'Wagga' <o:p></o:p>

but 'Woy Woy' can't be called 'Woy'.<o:p></o:p>

19. You believe that cooked-down axle grease makes a good breakfast Spread.<o:p></o:p>

20. You believe all famous Kiwis are actually Australian, until they stuff up, <o:p></o:p>

at which point they again become Kiwis.<o:p></o:p>

21. You know, whatever the tourist books say, that no one says 'cobber'.<o:p></o:p>

22. You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition <o:p></o:p>

of the Angels' song Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again.<o:p></o:p>

23. You believe, as an article of faith, that the confectionery known as the Wagon Wheel <o:p></o:p>

has become smaller with every passing year.<o:p></o:p>

24. You still don't get why the 'Labor' in 'Australian Labor Party' is not spelt with a 'u'.<o:p></o:p>

25. You wear ugh boots outside the house.<o:p></o:p>

26. You believe, as an article of faith, that every important discovery in the world was made <o:p></o:p>

by an Australian but then sold off to the Yanks for a pittance.<o:p></o:p>

27. You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you like them.<o:p></o:p>

28. Whatever your linguistic skills, you find yourself able to order takeaway fluently <o:p></o:p>

in every Asian language.<o:p></o:p>

29. You understand that 'excuse me' can sound rude, while 'scuse me' is always polite.<o:p></o:p>

30. You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasion via your Nose.<o:p></o:p>

31. You understand that 'you' has a plural and that it's 'youse'.<o:p></o:p>

32. You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to handle.<o:p></o:p>

33. Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules for beach cricket.<o:p></o:p>

34. You shake your head in horror when companies try to market what they call 'Anzac cookies'.<o:p></o:p>

35. You still think of Kylie as 'that girl off Neighbours'.<o:p></o:p>

36. When returning home from overseas, you expect to be brutally strip-searched by Customs - <o:p></o:p>

just in case you're trying to sneak in Fruit.<o:p></o:p>

37. You believe the phrase 'smart casual' refers to a pair of black tracky daks, suitably laundered.<o:p></o:p>

38. You understand that all train timetables are works of fiction.<o:p></o:p>

39. When working on a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need <o:p></o:p>

to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer.<o:p></o:p>

40. You get choked up with emotion by the first verse of the national anthem <o:p></o:p>

and then have trouble remembering the second.<o:p></o:p>

41. You find yourself ignorant of nearly all the facts deemed essential in the government's <o:p></o:p>

new test for migrants.<o:p></o:p>

42. You will immediately forward this list to other Australians, here and overseas, <o:p></o:p>

realizing that only they will understand. <o:p></o:p>

<o:p></o:p>



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I must admit to entering a public house for the specific purpose of observing #22.

I've been wrestling with #13 ever since I stopped for petrol beside the Big Prawn (in Ballina, for those interested) and felt the need to inhale the fumes from the fuel, as it was less nauseating than aroma from the building next door.

Eventually I made a rush inside where the aircon made a big difference.

It was, however, a time of year where #32 occurred within 20 minutes of parking in the sun.
 
:D

I'm Australian on number 22 alone! :)

As for number 3: this obviously refers to his nickname, or he is a sheila, as everybody knows all Australian men are named Bruce.

BTW, great post Bruce!


Bruce.
 
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Actually a good mate of mine, who shares a passion for P4's, has a favourite saying for when he's leaving; "I'm off, like prawns in the sun!"


I've been attempting to convince him to join this forum, so this thread could be the clincher....
 

David Lowe

Lifetime Supporter
Hi Pete would you also consider adding: That if you asked a 'sheila' for a look at their Map of Tasmania you may get a slap in the face. (....or maybe not it's all in the delivery)
 

Pete McCluskey.

Lifetime Supporter
Hi Pete would you also consider adding: That if you asked a 'sheila' for a look at their Map of Tasmania you may get a slap in the face. (....or maybe not it's all in the delivery)

You're leading with your chin Bruce, seeing where you live, but I reckon you would get away with it as long as you filled her up with Champers or Chardey and prawns first. Most Aussie Sheila's are good sports after a few coldies. If you get a slap just go watch the footy with the boys and have another go later.
 
Awe geez pete, fair suck of the sav mate, whatya tryin to say
i'm off like a robbers dog to get a sux pac an av a schooner or three
avagoodweekend
Kaspa
 
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