Census Forms

[David Morton]

If you want to share some of the comments you have made on your UK Census Form, write them up here.

 

I loved the David Frost comment from many years ago when filling in his census form. He placed a blob of candle wax on the section marked "Do not write in this space" on the very sound premise that if he couldn't write in the space, then no-one else would be able to either....

 

[Dalton Veitch]

Funny thing, we're about to have a census here in Oz. I don't know what they do with the information gathered, but it certainly doesn't get used in planning. It always seems to come as a complete surprise to the Federal Government that the infrastructure has not kept up with the growth in population, the water supply is marginal, the power supply ditto, transport inadequate, roads too narrow with insufficient through roads or ring roads, etc. The required skilled trades and professionals have not been trained in sufficient numbers, and so on. Census? Bah! Humbug!

 

[Jeff Young]

God save the Queen!
I mean it man!

 

[Mike Pass]

It's going to be great when all the illegals dutifully fill in their census forms!!!!!
Cheers
Mike

 

[Chris E]

My son insists I put his religion in as Jedi.

 

[Keith]

Did he Force you Chris? :laugh:

 

[Graham]

My son insists I put his religion in as Jedi.

Apparently. Jedi is the most popular non religion that people put on their census form....

I may choose Jedi myself, although I have heard that they live a celibate life. If that is the case, I think I would head over to the Dark Side quite quickly...

 

[Keith]

Oh the Farce is strong with us today..

PS I have just heard a scrape scrape noise followed by an audible thump (tump if you're Irish) so I conclude that my form has arrived. I shall approach it with interest since it will be the last one.

Am I right in thinking that the census was once carried out by real people on the doorstep in the UK?

 

[domtoni]

Got mine and I really don't want to respond, but I understand I will be fined if I don't co-operate.

 

[David Morton]

One wonders how the Royal Family will answer some of the questions. I bet Philip
will not tell the truth about who is related to who and who is gainfully employed.
It will all be deceit and lies from the first to the last page.....

 

[Jim Craik]

It will all be deceit and lies from the first to the last page.....<!-- google_ad_section_end -->

Posted by David

David, your Royal Family sounds a lot like our modern Concervatives

 

[David Morton]

Be careful what you say.....
They are all in it together and they are part of the 'firm'.
Don't answer your door late at night......

 

[Pete McCluskey.]

Funny thing, we're about to have a census here in Oz. I don't know what they do with the information gathered, but it certainly doesn't get used in planning. It always seems to come as a complete surprise to the Federal Government that the infrastructure has not kept up with the growth in population, the water supply is marginal, the power supply ditto, transport inadequate, roads too narrow with insufficient through roads or ring roads, etc. The required skilled trades and professionals have not been trained in sufficient numbers, and so on. Census? Bah! Humbug!

+10000, Absolute waste of time and money. Nobody who should, takes any notice of it. To busy talking up Vegemite with Obama and having cocktails....

 

[Keith]

Be careful what you say.....
They are all in it together and they are part of the 'firm'.
Don't answer your door late at night......

Interesting observation David. I looked up the word Paranoia in the dictionary after you posted that and I swear it said "What do you want to know for?" :shifty:

By the way, I put my name down as "Person1" then crossed it out carelessly and put in my own name spelt wrong and then put it in spelt right. I had a brainwave and switched to a fountain pen which blobs a lot.

To be fair, once I'd checked the boxes. Employment - nah, sick - ya, own home no mortgage - ya, number of persons in house - 1, they kind of lost interest in me and I only ended up having to answer about 8 questions total.

I was quite pleased to see that they have finally lasted "English" as a nationality, as you will remember the brouhaha over the choice of being only British, Welsh, Scottish or Irish Tinker

 

[David Morton]

I hope this is the last such nonsense. My youngest daughter was unhappy at some of the questions. She actually doubted the relevance of them in a society where some of the young take what ever work that's offered. She thought twice about disclosing
information about her employment and I think she was probably right as well. If there is ever another census then the only languages that should be acceptable should be the national languages - English, Welsh, Gaelic, and Geordie.

 

[Keith]

I hope this is the last such nonsense. My youngest daughter was unhappy at some of the questions. She actually doubted the relevance of them in a society where some of the young take what ever work that's offered. She thought twice about disclosing
information about her employment and I think she was probably right as well. If there is ever another census then the only languages that should be accepteable should be the national languages - English, Welsh, Gaelic, and Geordie.

Nae Glasgie? :stunned:

 

[Dalton Veitch]

Trying not to derail the thread, but I rather like Glasgow. However there seem to be several languages there. Some were close enough to Australian English for me to understand, and some were so foreign that in a coffee shop or store I simply held out a handful of currency and said "take the right amount".
Anyway, I take it your census covers all the above "countries"?

 

[David Morton]

Dalton,
Derail as much as you like as I think it makes these threads so much 'richer' and less tedious. Its all a bit of light hearted sillyness and banter at the end of the say. No doubt the dwellers of the New Forest will have something to add soon - if he hasn't been on internet most of the night.
And yes - it covers all countries in Great Britain and Northern Ireland.
In every language in the world if you need to by just ringing up.
I wish I'd done mine in Maori or Tongan now. Just for the hell of it.

 

[Keith]

I am a New Forest Dweller
My Face is covered with Woad
I sit up all night and tap unuseful tripe
So plain it must be code

In my Hut I eat some Cheese
Whenever I can get some,
Which isn't very often
'Cos some toe rag nicks them

I have a 3 wheeled buggy
which used to feature 4
But after a Beverage Incident
I seem to need One More

My lungs are in a bottle
I fill up every day
Just like my Captain Morgan
There is no other way

"Enough of this shite" I hear you say
"You must be in your cups
You've nicked my thread,
You've insulted me,
So shut the fuck right up"

Goooood Moaning GT40''''''''''ssssssssss