Recent content by David Lowe

Not sure if this has been posted before. Apologies if so. Research shows that there are 7 kinds of sex. The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex. * This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone, and you have sex until you are blue in the face. The 2nd kind of sex is...

Jack goes to his friend Mike and says ..."I'm sleeping with the minister's wife. Can you keep him back in church for an hour after service for me?" Mike doesn't like it, but being a friend, he agrees. After the service, Mike starts talking to the minister, asking him all...

When I was ready to check out and pay for my groceries the cashier said, "Strip down, facing me." Making a mental note so I could complain to my local MP about this unnecessary security rubbish, I did just as she instructed. After the shrieking and hysteria finally subsided, I...

British Humour A big earthquake with the strength of 9.9 on the Richter scale hits the Middle East . Six million Muslims die and over a million are injured. Iraq , Iran and Syria are totally ruined and the governments don't know where to start with providing help to rebuild. The...

I always wanted to be a mailman One Monday morning, Shane the mailman, was riding through the neighborhood on his usual route, delivering the mail. As he approached one of the homes he noticed that both cars were still in the driveway. His wonder was cut short by David, the...

Not a bad come back line!! A divorced man meets his ex-wife's new husband at a party. Later, after knocking back a few drinks, he goes over to the new bloke and asks him: 'So... How do you like using second hand stuff?' The new husband replies: 'It isn't that bad. Past the first 3...

Things that end with “tor" A teacher asked her third grade class to name things that ended with “tor” and that also ate things. The first little boy said, "Alligator." "Very good James, that's a big word." The second boy said, "Predator." “Yes, that's another big word Alan. Very...

I really like the design. Apparently Todd Willing is a Hobart Tassie boy so good on him. Looks like we may not see the car here in Oz though (no R/H drive model) :-(...

NAG! NAG! NAG! An attorney arrived home late, after a very tough day trying to get a stay of execution for his client. His last minute plea for clemency to the governor had failed and he was feeling worn out and depressed. As soon as he walked through the door at home, his...

A circus owner runs an advert for a ‘lion tamer wanted’ and two people show up. One is a retired golfer in his late-sixties and the other is a drop-dead, gorgeous brunette with a killer body in her mid-twenties. The circus owner tells them, "I'm not going to sugar coat it. This is one...

A Catholic Priest, a Protestant Preacher and a Rabbi all served as Chaplains to the students of NorthernMichiganUniversity at Marquette in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop. One day, someone made the comment that...

Good to hear you're back on track with your RF GT40 build Dan. Look forward to the progress posts.

A Scotsman's Chilli A hungry bloke walks into a seedy cafe in Glasgow....... He sits at the counter and notices a Jock with his arms folded staring blankly at a bowl of chilli. After fifteen minutes of just sitting there staring at it, the hungry bloke bravely asks, "If you aren't going...

"Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?"...the woman asked her husband. "No"...said her husband. She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top 3 or 4 buttons of her blouse...and slowly reached down into the cleavage created by a soft, silky push-up...

A guy walks into a bar with a monkey. The monkey grabbed some olives off the bar and ate them. Then he grabbed some sliced limes and ate them. He then jumped onto the pool table and grabbed one of the balls. To everyone's amazement, he stuck it in his mouth and somehow swallowed it...