lifes questions

Here's one.
If we now have equality between men and women, why can't women raise the toilet seat when they're done or put it down prior to use? Where is it written that men have to put the seat down?
 

Pat

Supporter
Perhaps I can answer that question with a short story:

A young couple were in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they were undressing for bed, the husband -- who was a big burly man -- tossed his trousers to his bride and said, "Here, put these on." She put them on and the waist was twice the size of her body.

"I can't wear your trousers," she said.

"That's right," said the husband, "and don't you ever forget it. I'm the man who wears the pants in this family."

With that she flipped him her panties and said, "Try these on."

He tried them on and found he could only get them on as far as his kneecaps. "Hell," he said. "I can't get into your panties!"

She replied, "That's right, and that's the way it's going to stay until your attitude changes."
 

Keith

Moderator
That perfectly correct Pat. When I said to my ex ex ex wife that "I wear the trousers around here" she replied, "yes of course you do, but I will tell you which ones to wear"

The toilet seat conundrum will never be solved and should be filed under the heading: 'How to Have Your Cake and Eat It"
 

Randy V

Moderator-Admin
Staff member
Admin
Lifetime Supporter
Was overhearing a conversation between two women about the man being the head of the household.

The younger woman (early twenties) said that her husband declared himself to be the head of the household.

The elder woman (mother?) replied - yes dear, that is right. But remember one thing. While the man is the head of the house, the woman is the neck. The neck determines which direction the head is facing.

They wandered off before I summoned the courage to speak up.... Probably a good thing!
 
To follow up with Pat said..... Yep, they control the "cookie."

A buddy explained it this way..

"In a million plus years, the "cookie" has gone undefeated."
 
It's not about control, who decided that guys could touch the toilet seat but women couldn't? The only answer I've ever gotten about why the seat should be left down is the women's fear of sitting in the water which I think is stupid. What guy ever forgot to put the seat down before sitting?
More questions
Why Do Women Go to the Bathroom In Groups?
Why Are Women's Public Restrooms so Gross?
Why Do Girls Take so Long to Get Ready?
Why Are Women's Fashions so Complicated?
Why Do Women Have so Many Shoes?

I don't have any questions about why guys do things. We have things figured out rationally.
 

Pat

Supporter
I don't have any questions about why guys do things. We have things figured out rationally.

Like my wife says, you guys are so lucky, if there's a wall you have a bathroom. I like to think of it as "picnic equipment"...
 
...uuuuh...'not insinuating anything here, Tom, but...just how would you know that??? :D[/LEFT]

I worked at a gas station when I was a kid, the men's room was always easier to clean than the women's room. But thanks for asking. I found these question online.
 

Randy V

Moderator-Admin
Staff member
Admin
Lifetime Supporter
I worked at a gas station when I was a kid, the men's room was always easier to clean than the women's room. But thanks for asking. I found these question online.

I worked at them too and this is all too true... There were things in the toil :lipsrsealed::lipsrsealed::lipsrsealed::lipsrsealed:

Enough... I think i'm getting sick just remembering!!!

:stunned:

:toilet: :yuck:
 
I was talking to my sister on the phone, I asked her the toilet seat question, she wanted to know why women should lift the seat just so we could pee. I asked her why we should put it down just so they could pee. That takes care of phone calls for a while!
 
If everyone put the lid down when done, everyone would raise it to begin with.
Women, being the weaker sex would only have to lift half the weight.
 

Keith

Moderator
Now this may be a bit ancient, but it still rings very true.

Undeniable logic at work here:

WHY MEN ARE SELDOM DEPRESSED
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
They know stuff about tanks. (This is especially true :) )
A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.

They can open all their own jars.
They get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite them, he or she can still be your friend.

Their underwear is £2.99 for a three-pack.
Two pairs of shoes are more than enough.

They almost never have strap problems in public.
They are unable to see creases in their clothes.
Everything on their face stays its original colour.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
They only have to shave their face and neck.
They can play with toys all their life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons.
They can wear shorts no matter how their legs look.

They can do their nails with a pocket knife.
They have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.

They can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives On December 24 in 25 minutes!!
Men Are Just Happier People, too!
NICKNAMES : If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Nobby and Tosser.
EATING OUT: When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in a tenner, even though it's only for £25. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
MONEY: A man will pay £2 for a £1 item he needs. A woman will pay £1 for a £2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.
BATHROOMS: A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.
ARGUMENTS: A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
FUTURE: A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
MARRIAGE: A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
DRESSING UP: A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL
: Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
OFFSPRING: Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!
 
Why Women are happy to be seen in the skimpiest of bathing costumes, Yet go in to a complete tizz if the wind blows thier skirt or dress up.
 
I always put the seat down. In fact I close the lid too. Now here's the funny bit....

My Mrs. gets upset by my closing the lid! Says she has to remember to lift it in the night when she goes.

WTF?? You really can't win.
 
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