Hey! Christmas Soon - My List

Keith

Moderator
I thought it would be time for all my friends to think about what I would like for Christmas, so instead of leaving a wish list on Amazon, I thought I'd post it here. It may be clear to most of you that I have two left hands and 16 thumbs and need all the help with tools I can get, so here are some ideas.

You could mix and match!

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Shop early & Save! :)
 
Can't stop laughing you bastard! I particularly like the smoke and noise generator! And the manual chainsaw! Must-have items for any home! :)
 
You're getting the Muppet Gloves from me. But only if available with 2LH 16 Thumb versions :thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup:
 

Pete McCluskey.

Lifetime Supporter
I live in tropical Queensland and sand flies are little bugs that when y
Thet bite me bring me out in large itchy lumps for about two weeks.
Your pet bug just looks like one. I keep trying to squish it....I'm a slow learner.
 

Keith

Moderator
Pete mate. Have you just consumed a slab of amber? That's the second time you've mentioned bugs, and I have no idea what you're on about but it sounds like you have an infestation in your machine. :huh:

swat.jpg
 
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Mike Pass

Supporter
I've got to get one of those cordless hammers. I'm sick to death of having a mains cable trailing behind mine. I used to have a digital one some years ago but it stopped working when I changed to Windows 7 and they didn't do an updated driver for it. Typical bloody Microsoft!
Cheers
Mike
 

Jim Rosenthal

Supporter
Keith, this is priceless. Did you ever see a publication called "Items From Our Catalog"? It is somewhat reminiscent of this one.... this one has more edge, though.
 

Keith

Moderator
Not that I recall Jim, but I'm glad to see you're up and about. There was a rumour that you'd tried a coalminers breakfast :stunned:
 

David Morton

Lifetime Supporter
Black pudding is new super-food!



The centuries-old breakfast favourite, Black Pudding, has been rated as a super-food by leading top nutritionists at the Didcott Food and Drink Research Laboratories.

A report reveals that black pudding has now joined the ranks of super-healthy foodstuffs such as purple carrots, macaroons and seaweed - all believed to help you live longer, enjoy improved memory, and live longer.

The report concluded, "We need to change our thinking regarding black pudding.
 
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Jim Rosenthal

Supporter
Right. This reminds me of the NYTimes article which reported that kids in US schools fed healthy lunches were throwing them out. One child was quoted as saying "before, lunch tasted bad and cost a lot. Now it's healthy, which is even worse"

I love it. Out of the mouths of babes......
 

David Morton

Lifetime Supporter
How about a hunt for the tackiest Christmas present ever?
I guess its a no brainer that Matelan will win - can you believe you have to be a member to shop there?
 

Keith

Moderator
Finding a present for you David is once again proving a daunting task.

I mean just what do you give a man that's got everything?
 

David Morton

Lifetime Supporter
I admit it. It's true. I have everything.
I just had a haircut yesterday and my hairdresser Sarah said a similar thing. My last appointment was 7 weeks previous and she commented my hair had grown over 5cm.(2") I think she was saying that just about all the guys at 65 are mostly bald, or wearing a Bobby Charlton, and in common with everything else I have my hair, and it's growing at approx. 1mm. every day.
Because I only pay her pensioners Haircut rates she thinks I should see her every month which will nearly double her income from me.
So Keith, where is this leading to: One of those self help hairdresser thingys might be a good Christmas thingamejig and then I could cut my own hair.

It could be all the iron in the pigs blood in the black pudding I have for breakfast every morning?

.
 
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Keith I havre thought about it long and hard and I dont think anything is good enough for you ,So thats what Im getting you.

NOTHING

Funny I think thats the same gift I got you last year.

Jim
 

Jim Rosenthal

Supporter
.......he's got HAGS...

...what's HAGS?.....

...it's herpes, AIDS, gonorrhea and syphilis rolled into one...

...that's really serious! How do you treat that?...

...with the P&P diet, that's how we treat it.......

....really? What's in the P&P diet?...

...pancakes and pizza.........

...OK, why pancakes and pizza?..........








...it's the only thing that will fit under the door after we throw him in and weld it shut......
 
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