Jokes anyone? -
- Thread starter p thompson
- Start date
They walk amoung us..... https://www.facebook.com/share/v/19KqPdkYM6/
Murder scene? Exorcism?
Halloween at my house.......
It's not Christmas until Hans Gruber falls from the Nakatomi Tower!
This is true
Ho Ho Ho I Have a Machine Gun
I'm getting totally fed up with people whining about the price of things - $2.50 for iced tea, $3.50 for coffee, $4 for a slice of cake, $5 to park the car. Any more complaining and I'm going to stop inviting people over.
Bill Kearley
Supporter
We all know we need a marriage license for a man and a woman to get married, what do lesbians need ?
A lickher license.
A lickher license.
Neil
Supporter
True Story....
A Christmas Gift from Antarctica
In the Fall of 1956, I was attending The College Of William & Mary and my roommate was Mike Seif, a fellow from New York City'. Mike was a pre- med student and he needed a few extra points to compete in that field. It was just before Christmas when Mike received a notice from the Williamsburg post office that he had a package waiting to be picked up.
Since it included a customs declaration and return address of “McMurdo Sound”in the Antarctic and the declaration specified “Marine Biological Samples” it was certainly something worth investigating.
Mike was excited by this news. We had known a fellow dorm student who had graduated the year before and was sent to McMurdo to do scientific research. Marine biological samples might be a way to gain a few Brownie points with the head of the department. Mike was so excited and in such a hurry to get dressed, he neglected to notice that he put on one black shoe and one white one. We noticed but kept quiet.
Walking to the post office generated amused looks on the faces of those noticing Mike's mis- matched shoes but we kept silent. At the post office Mike presented his notice and the clerk handed him a small string-tied paper-wrapped box. Sure enough, it was stamped “Marine Biological Samples”. We hurried back to Mike's Bio lab and encountered the head of the department, Elaine Caulkins- an older lady, barely 5 ft tall with her hair pulled back in a bun. Mike quickly explained that it was from the South Pole and played up its scientific importance.
Miss Caulkins unwrapped it in front of a gathering audience of curious students-the rumor was spreading about exotic samples from the South Pole. Inside was a sealed metal can without any label. Caulkins rummaged around among her drawer full of cat food cans to find a can opener and began to remove the lid from the can. When the can lid was pierced, a bad smell was immediately apparent and it got worse as the can opener went 'round the can. By the time the lid was cut all around the stench was overpowering!
As she folded back the lid to reveal its contents, someone blurted out “That looks like...”. the remark was cut off by her chuckling and declaring “Hee Hee, it does look like some sort of fecal material”. She then removed the lid to retrieve a small piece of folded paper. She read it to the assembled crowd.. “Merry Christmas. Stan Wilson”. It was a full can of penguin droppings that Stan had collected-- frozen solid—and canned for shipment to Mike. We wrapped it in three layers of plastic but the smell was still overpowering. We tried to think of something we could do to Stan but there was nothing that could top the stunt that he had just perpetrated.
WARNING!!! If the South Pole ever thaws out we will all die of “Penguin Stench”.
A Christmas Gift from Antarctica
In the Fall of 1956, I was attending The College Of William & Mary and my roommate was Mike Seif, a fellow from New York City'. Mike was a pre- med student and he needed a few extra points to compete in that field. It was just before Christmas when Mike received a notice from the Williamsburg post office that he had a package waiting to be picked up.
Since it included a customs declaration and return address of “McMurdo Sound”in the Antarctic and the declaration specified “Marine Biological Samples” it was certainly something worth investigating.
Mike was excited by this news. We had known a fellow dorm student who had graduated the year before and was sent to McMurdo to do scientific research. Marine biological samples might be a way to gain a few Brownie points with the head of the department. Mike was so excited and in such a hurry to get dressed, he neglected to notice that he put on one black shoe and one white one. We noticed but kept quiet.
Walking to the post office generated amused looks on the faces of those noticing Mike's mis- matched shoes but we kept silent. At the post office Mike presented his notice and the clerk handed him a small string-tied paper-wrapped box. Sure enough, it was stamped “Marine Biological Samples”. We hurried back to Mike's Bio lab and encountered the head of the department, Elaine Caulkins- an older lady, barely 5 ft tall with her hair pulled back in a bun. Mike quickly explained that it was from the South Pole and played up its scientific importance.
Miss Caulkins unwrapped it in front of a gathering audience of curious students-the rumor was spreading about exotic samples from the South Pole. Inside was a sealed metal can without any label. Caulkins rummaged around among her drawer full of cat food cans to find a can opener and began to remove the lid from the can. When the can lid was pierced, a bad smell was immediately apparent and it got worse as the can opener went 'round the can. By the time the lid was cut all around the stench was overpowering!
As she folded back the lid to reveal its contents, someone blurted out “That looks like...”. the remark was cut off by her chuckling and declaring “Hee Hee, it does look like some sort of fecal material”. She then removed the lid to retrieve a small piece of folded paper. She read it to the assembled crowd.. “Merry Christmas. Stan Wilson”. It was a full can of penguin droppings that Stan had collected-- frozen solid—and canned for shipment to Mike. We wrapped it in three layers of plastic but the smell was still overpowering. We tried to think of something we could do to Stan but there was nothing that could top the stunt that he had just perpetrated.
WARNING!!! If the South Pole ever thaws out we will all die of “Penguin Stench”.
I don't know if the story is true, but it appears that the Penguin Stench is real.
https://www.sciencenews.org/article/penguin-poop-climate-change-antarctica
https://agupubs.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1029/2002jd002114