Pete McCluskey.
Lifetime Supporter
A dilemma (NSFW)
- Thread starter Fred W B
- Start date
but can she drive it in those shoes?
Cheers
Fred W B
I have come to notice(only slightly) that the delimmas presented here are, for all intents and purpose, female in origin. I would like to break the mold and present a MALE delimma. And seeing as it is not in keeping that to show the male body, I will leave it up to your imagination with the following story.
Subject: Chinese Torture
A young man was wandering, lost, in a forest when he came upon a small house.
Knocking on the door he was greeted by an old Chinaman with a long, gray beard.
"I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?"
"Certainly," the Chinaman said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese tortures known to man."
"OK," said the man, thinking that the daughter must be pretty old as well, and entered the house.
Before dinner the daughter came down the stairs. She was young, beautiful and had a fantastic figure. She was obviously attracted to the young man as she couldn't keep her eyes off him during the meal.
Remembering the old man's warning he ignored her and went up to bed alone.
Delimma#1
During the night he could bear it no longer and sneaked into her room for a night of passion. He was careful to keep everything quiet so the old man wouldn't hear and, near dawn, he crept back to his room, exhausted but happy.
He woke to feel a tremendous pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes he saw a large boulder on his chest with a note on it that read: "Chinese Torture #1: Large rock on chest."
"Well, that's pretty crappy," he thought. "If that's the best the old man can do then I don't have much to worry about."
Delimma #2
He picked the boulder up, walked over to the window and threw the boulder out.
As he did so he noticed another note on it that read: "Chinese Torture #2: Rock tied to left testicle."
In a panic he glanced and saw the line that was getting close to taut.
Delimma#3
Figuring that a few broken bones was better than castration, he jumped out of the window after the boulder.
As he plummeted downward he saw a large sign on the ground that read: "Chinese Torture #3: Right testicle tied to bedpost.
Bill
Subject: Chinese Torture
A young man was wandering, lost, in a forest when he came upon a small house.
Knocking on the door he was greeted by an old Chinaman with a long, gray beard.
"I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?"
"Certainly," the Chinaman said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese tortures known to man."
"OK," said the man, thinking that the daughter must be pretty old as well, and entered the house.
Before dinner the daughter came down the stairs. She was young, beautiful and had a fantastic figure. She was obviously attracted to the young man as she couldn't keep her eyes off him during the meal.
Remembering the old man's warning he ignored her and went up to bed alone.
Delimma#1
During the night he could bear it no longer and sneaked into her room for a night of passion. He was careful to keep everything quiet so the old man wouldn't hear and, near dawn, he crept back to his room, exhausted but happy.
He woke to feel a tremendous pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes he saw a large boulder on his chest with a note on it that read: "Chinese Torture #1: Large rock on chest."
"Well, that's pretty crappy," he thought. "If that's the best the old man can do then I don't have much to worry about."
Delimma #2
He picked the boulder up, walked over to the window and threw the boulder out.
As he did so he noticed another note on it that read: "Chinese Torture #2: Rock tied to left testicle."
In a panic he glanced and saw the line that was getting close to taut.
Delimma#3
Figuring that a few broken bones was better than castration, he jumped out of the window after the boulder.
As he plummeted downward he saw a large sign on the ground that read: "Chinese Torture #3: Right testicle tied to bedpost.
Bill
Well, that's certainly a new direction, Bill. Should keep us thinking quietly for a little while. The opposite gender could find this amusing.
Chris Kouba
Supporter
A more appropriate dilemma:
Jennifer Aniston, 41, wins the battle of the bikinis with younger model Brooklyn Decker, 23 | Mail Online (yes, it is SFW)
For those wishing instant gratification (can't wait to click the link), I give you the dilemma of:
--- Vs. ---
Jennifer Aniston, 41, wins the battle of the bikinis with younger model Brooklyn Decker, 23 | Mail Online (yes, it is SFW)
For those wishing instant gratification (can't wait to click the link), I give you the dilemma of:
Pete McCluskey.
Lifetime Supporter
A more appropriate dilemma:
Jennifer Aniston, 41, wins the battle of the bikinis with younger model Brooklyn Decker, 23 | Mail Online (yes, it is SFW)
For those wishing instant gratification (can't wait to click the link), I give you the dilemma of:
--- Vs. ---
Personally I think the young blonde shades Jennifer, but then I've always preffered Blondes.
Attachments
She certainly looks very proud Marcus!
I never realised how much the Germans appreciated a full bust and/or a full stomach until I entered a drinking competion in Munich during the Beer Festival in 1978. I had won every (drinking) round until we had to be measured around our waists (in front of about 2,000 or so people).
Of course, in true Brit style I sucked in my copious nether regions until a friendly frau whispered that the larger the waistline the sexier I was!
Using all of my muscular resources I thrust out my gut, and won!
A plate of Pig Trotter with mashed potato. But, it was nice. Good fun.....
I never realised how much the Germans appreciated a full bust and/or a full stomach until I entered a drinking competion in Munich during the Beer Festival in 1978. I had won every (drinking) round until we had to be measured around our waists (in front of about 2,000 or so people).
Of course, in true Brit style I sucked in my copious nether regions until a friendly frau whispered that the larger the waistline the sexier I was!
Using all of my muscular resources I thrust out my gut, and won!
A plate of Pig Trotter with mashed potato. But, it was nice. Good fun.....
Pete McCluskey.
Lifetime Supporter
Yep and imagine how much more she has learnt.:shy:
Maybe, but I thought possibly this was one of Brad's reasons for leaving her for the equally hot, but far more adventurous Angelina...
Pete McCluskey.
Lifetime Supporter
You've outdone yourself Pete... top shelf!
Was that seventh one a Ferrari?
I think the dilemma here is, "When do you get your work done, Pete?"
I think the dilemma here is, "When do you get your work done, Pete?"
Pete McCluskey.
Lifetime Supporter
The car is, and the girl could be Italian.
Strange as it seems I don't spend a lot of time on this site, and I'm very good at delegation.
