Press 1 for english..

"TENJOOBERRYMUDS".

I was recently in Miami and decided to learn the Spanish language, <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
so I could understand the check-outs at McDonalds.

My next move is to learn Indian, so I can understand my doctors and
<o:p></o:p>

the person that answers the phone when I have a warranty problem.

By the time you read the rest of this note, you will be able to
<o:p></o:p>

understand---"TENJOOBERRYMUDS"....

In order to continue getting-by in America (our home land), we all need
<o:p></o:p>

to learn the NEW English language! Practice by reading the following <o:p></o:p>

conversation until you are able to understand the term "TENJOOBERRYMUDS".

With a little patience, you'll be able to fit right in.
Now, here goes....
The following is a telephone exchange between maybe you as a hotel guest
<o:p></o:p>

and call room-service somewhere in the good old U S A today........

Room Service : "Morrin. Roon sirbees."

Guest : "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."

Room Service: " Rye . Roon sirbees...morrin! Joowish to oddor sunteen???"

Guest: "Uh..... Yes, I'd like to order bacon and eggs.."

Room Service: "Ow July den?"

Guest: "......What??"

Room Service: "Ow July den?!?... pryed, boyud, poochd?"

Guest: "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry... scrambled, please."

Room Service: "Ow July dee baykem? Crease?"

Guest: "Crisp will be fine."

Room Service: "Hokay. An Sahn toes?"

Guest: "What?"

Room Service: "An toes. July Sahn toes?"

Guest: "I.... don't think so."

RoomService: "No? Judo wan sahn toes???"

Guest: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan
<o:p></o:p>

sahn toes' means."

RoomService: "Toes! Toes!...Why Joo don Juan toes? Ow bow Anglish <o:p></o:p>

moppin we bodder?"

Guest: "Oh, English muffin!!! I've got it! You were saying 'toast'... Fine....
<o:p></o:p>

Yes, an English muffin will be fine."

RoomService: "We bodder?"

Guest: "No, just put the bodder on the side."

RoomService: "Wad?!?"

Guest: "I mean butter... just put the butter on the side."

RoomService: "Copy?"

Guest: "Excuse me?"

RoomService: "Copy...tea..meel?"

Guest: "Yes. Coffee, please... and that's everything."

RoomService: "One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin, <o:p></o:p>

we bodder on sigh and copy ... rye??"

Guest: "Whatever you say."

RoomService: "Tenjooberrymuds."

Guest: "You're welcome"

Remember I said "By the time you read through this YOU WILL UNDERSTAND
<o:p></o:p>

'TENJOOBERRYMUDS' "......and you do, don't you!
 

Terry Oxandale

Skinny Man
What a hoot (had to shut my door so the others in the office couldn't hear me laugh)!
Funny, sad, and true. You hit is all Jack.
 

Keith

Moderator
That's very true Jack.

I wonder if we could devise an English test that would really catch them out using humour.

Such as: "Explain the Meaning of The Following Story"

The Boss of a small company that had hit hard times in the economic meltdown decisded he had to let one of his staff go, but he couldn't make up his mind which one it would be. It would have to be either Jack or Mary.

He came up with a novel way of making a decision by seeing who visited the office water fountain first one day - they would get the chop.

Mary staggered up to the water fountain first with a raging hangover from partying the night before. The Boss reluctantly approached her and said "Hi Mary, I'm sure you know how I feel about this but I have to lay you or Jack off."

She replied "Hey, could you just jack off, I'm feeling like shit today"
 
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